17. How do you make up your mind? #LifeWideLearning16@bhwilkoff
â Zac Chase (@MrChase) January 17, 2016
I left my wife home with my one and a half year old when she was incredibly sick. She was in pain and I left her because I had something that I âcouldnât missâ at work. I wanted to find someone to take care of him, but we didnât have anyone to turn to on such short notice. And I knew it wasnât going to end well. I knew that I would be breaking her trust. I knew that there would be consequences within our relationship because of it. But, my mind was made up, and there wasnât anything left to do but walk out the door.
That is the problem with making up your mind. It doesnât leave a lot of room for other people. It doesnât leave a lot of room for feedback or reflection. It is absolute and unwavering.
I try not to make up my mind all that much because of this.
It isnât that I donât have opinions, and it certainly isnât that I donât speak my mind. I am nothing if not pedantic and steadfast. However, I am absolutely never so confident in my ideas as to not listen to what others have to say. I listen because I want my ideas to be better. I want to collaborate with others, even those who oppose me.
So, my mind is only ever made up for a few short hours. Until I consider a new perspective and get a bigger picture of what lies ahead. Or, until I act and have more information to influence my next made up mind.
I think that is why I donât really understand stubbornness, at least not fully. When can you be so sure of yourself that you canât see nuance? When do you know the situation so fully that only one option can be considered the right one?
I donât know a lot of things. In fact, given the vast array of information that Siri or Google knows, I know almost nothing. And that comforts me. It means that I donât have to feign a made up mind. It means that I donât have to be resolute all of the time. It means that I get to listen to others and see what makes sense, constantly weighing ideas and changing based upon new evidence.
I am not a made up mind. I am a cupped ear.
